Saturday 5 June 2010

Record Mirror 1985 - Invasion of The Bodysnatchers

Emergency! Emergency! Earth is in danger of being invaded by mutants from the 22nd century led by the notorious Fink Brothers. They stole a time machine and transported themselves back in time to 1985, to wreak more havoc than Maggie Thatcher and Arthur Scargill.

Hot on their heels is the legendary lawman Judge Dredd and the mighty Tharg, part time ruler of the universe and editor of the Galaxy's greatest comic 2000ad.

For periods of time the Fink Brothers have been taking over the bodies of Suggs and Carl from Madness, forcing them to record the single "Mutants in Mega City One " which features the additional track "Mutie Rap". (Became Mutants Blues - Editor)

"There was absolutely nothing we could do we were powerless to fight back." Explains Carl. "The time machine landed tight outside our offices and the Fink Brotheres broke down our door and walked right in.

"Apparently, It's always been their ambition to record a single. One of the brothers is called Mean, his father tore his arm off when he was young and he also tore off half his head, so he now has a metal arm and a metal head. His head has a dial on it and if the the dial is turned to four he gets really angry. Even if the dial is on one or two, you've got to be careful.

"The other one loves poisoning people and Animals" Explains carl. "One of his other hobbies is throwing spiked balls around. Both the Fink Brothers also like nuclear war and Ronald Reagan, which makes them even more unpleasant."

"They live in an are called Cursed Earth which is outside Mega City One and they're trying to get into the city with the other Mutants. Mega City One is where Judge Dredd and his friends dispense Justice The Fink Brothers have stolen some tapes of Dredd's voice which they've used on the single, so that's why he's coming after them.

"The Fink Brothers say they want to go out on tour, but their behaviour is terrible. They don't just bite the heads off pigeons, they bite the heads off humans as well and they smell worse than Lemmy's feet."

Carl and Suggs are praying that if the single sells enough copies the horrible brothers will be content to return to their own time and leave them in peace to concentrate on Madness.

"If the Fink Brothers go soon or if they're Zapped by Judge Dredd. Madness will be able to release a single followed by an album and then a tour. Says Suggs.

So instead of getting involved in the heady world of the heavy duty music biz, Chas and Suggs are happy to down by the fire and pore over their comic collections.

"I like american comics as well" says suggs "like most kids i was attracted by the shiny covers. I've gone off them a bit now though, I dont think the scripts in american comics are as good as they used to be.

"2000ad, which features Judge Dredd, is really great - a modent comic for modern times and deal with violence in an honest way. There's talk of making a Judge Dredd film but I dont know if and when that will happen."

"The Fink Brothers are also demanding that we make a video of their single. They say that if we can't afford it they'll rob a bank for us".

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